Ariana Losch
On rare occasions, I am reminded that the copyright laws in this country are a joke and I can’t even be that mad about it. Because what do you mean Trader Joe’s is releasing something called “Onion Flowers,” aka their frozen version of Outback’s infamous Bloomin’ Onion? How is this allowed and, more importantly, why didn’t it come out years ago? These are exactly the kind of shenanigans I expect from new Trader Joe’s products, and while I’m sure Outback isn’t too happy right now, I certainly am.
Ariana, I’ve never had a Bloomin’ Onion from Outback because—and this is true—I reside in a secluded, far-flung corner of outer space. Can you explain it?
Absolutely, but first: How’s the rent out there? Is your neighborhood cute and residential or more of a desolate lunar outpost? Let me know in the comments. Anyways, Outback’s Bloomin Onion is basically a whole onion that’s been battered, deep-fried, and cut to bloom like a flower. A stunning culinary invention by all accounts. It’s served with a spicy, tangy mayo dipping sauce that I personally think is the real reason everyone loves this iconic app…so hopefully TJ’s gets it right.
How close to the new Trader Joe’s dupe is the OG Bloomin’ Onion?
Well, I’d wager the TJ’s version might be smaller than the one you get from Outback, but I haven’t tried this for myself yet, so don’t quote me on that. This new Trader Joe’s product is also vegan, which the Bloomin’ Onion is definitely not (there’s egg and dairy in the batter). And if the picture on the box is to be believed, the TJ’s dupe also comes with a dipping sauce that looks pretty similar to Outback’s.
When can I pluck these so-called Onion Flowers from the Trader Joe’s freezer aisle?
Get out your gardening gloves, because according to @traderjoesobsessed on Instagram, these are hitting stores this week. To quote my favorite comment on the post: That’s “onion believable.” Yep. (My second favorite comment is just “AHHHHHHH.” Which, same.)
Danny Palumbo
Gwynedd Stuart
