Breaking up with someone used to be simple. You had an awkward conversation, returned the hoodie you’d been holding hostage, and spent the next few weeks trying not to like anything on Instagram.
Videos by Sporked
But AWAKE Chocolate has come up with another option: Send them trail mix and tell them to take a hike.
The caffeinated chocolate brand just launched Caffeinated Trail Mix, packing 80mg of caffeine into each serving. And because regular product launches are boring, AWAKE is also selling a $29.99 “Take A Hike” Breakup Box designed to help you dump your summer fling.
It comes with trail mix, tissues, a compass, a red flag, a luggage tag, and one single hiking sock. Nothing says “we’re over” like leaving someone with cold feet in the most literal sense.
80mg Of Caffeine Per Serving
The new Caffeinated Trail Mix comes in two flavors: Classic Crunch and Sweet & Salty. Each serving contains 80mg of caffeine from AWAKE’s caffeinated chocolate, plus 5-6 grams of protein.
For reference, AWAKE says that’s about as much caffeine as a small cup of coffee. Except you can eat this by the handful at your desk without anyone asking why you’re on your fifth coffee before lunch.
The launch takes AWAKE beyond its usual caffeinated chocolate bars and bites, although trail mix feels like a pretty logical place for caffeinated chocolate to end up. Trail mix is already supposed to give you energy. This one just has the paperwork to prove it.
AWAKE Caffeinated Trail Mix is available now at Amazon, Kroger, The Fresh Market, Fresh Thyme, and select convenience and foodservice retailers. It’ll also arrive at Wawa in October. Single-serve packs start at $2.49, while multipacks start at $9.99, depending on the retailer.
A Literal Red Flag
Of course, the trail mix isn’t the strangest part of this launch.
AWAKE’s limited-edition Take A Hike Breakup Box costs $29.99 and contains everything your ex needs to get the message: Caffeinated Trail Mix, tissues, a compass, a red flag, a luggage tag, and a single hiking sock.
The red flag feels self-explanatory. The compass can point them in literally any direction away from you. And the lone sock? According to AWAKE, it’s because your ex is “no longer part of a pair.”
Ouch.
The Take A Hike Breakup Box launched September 15th and is available from AWAKE while supplies last.
So, if your summer fling has somehow made it all the way to fall, $29.99 gets you a breakup message, several visual metaphors, and enough caffeine to give them the energy to leave.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!