A new Coffee Mate creamer has arrived on the scene. But coffee lovers, don’t get too excited—this one’s not meant for you. Coffee Mate Dirty Soda Orange Crème Pop is the second creamer in their dirty soda line (following the success of Coconut Lime), and it’s meant to be mixed with orange soda. Specifically, Orange Crush. (It says so on the bottle. I didn’t make the rules.)
The dirty soda phenomenon is a fun one. We have the Mormons to thank for it and, as much as I don’t want to acknowledge #MomTok in any capacity, we have The Secret Lives of Mormon Wives to thank for introducing it to many non-Mormon folks. It’s basically soda, half-and-half or creamer, some kind of flavored syrup, and occasionally a citrus like lemon or lime. I’m on record as saying a good dirty soda is better than a complicated mocktail—so I was genuinely excited to try this.
In life, for the most part, I do as I’m told. Coffee Mate told me to mix this with Orange Crush, so I did it. And, well…here’s my full, honest review of the new dirty soda creamer from Coffee Mate.
- Coffee Mate Dirty Soda Orange Crème Pop
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Pros: Holy creamsicle. That tastes like something straight out of a convenience store freezer. It’s that very nostalgic, slightly artificial, classic creamsicle flavor (pretty similar to the one we liked in our popsicle ranking), and guys, it’s potent. One little dollop (I say “dollop” instead of “drop,” because this stuff is thick) goes a long, long, long, long way. Perhaps you’re sensing from my tone that I don’t necessarily think that’s a great thing. You would be right—but hey, at least it’s economical.
Cons: Every time I’m about to rip into a product, I feel guilty. I have the urge to apologize to the Coffee Mate PR person who will inevitably read this. (Hi there. Hope you’re having a nice day.) So first, let me say: Skip the orange soda. Try this new Coffee Mate creamer in a Coke or root beer instead. Why? Because it’s so much of one flavor when it’s mixed with orange soda. The whole point of a dirty soda is to get a little bit of this and a little bit of that, sort of mimicking the experience of a cocktail. Every sip should end differently than how it starts, but with this, you’re getting a boatload of sugar and two different kinds of orange syrup.
Conclusion: The experience is nice for a few sips, and then you’re sick of it. In other kinds of soda, though, it’s much more fun and interesting to drink.
Credit: Liv Averett / Target
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