If you’re like most people and your dream wedding takes place among aisles of pantry staples from brands you’ve never heard of, then you’re in luck because Aldi just said “I do” to you (or someone who loves Aldi even more than you) getting married there. The budget grocery store chain wants to award one “crazy-in-love-with-Aldi couple an opportunity to celebrate the ultimate life milestone” with them—the “ultimate milestone” being an Aldi wedding. This all may seem a bit out of the blue, but apparently people propose and get proposed to in Aldis all the time?! So this was the store’s way of taking that a step (or like, 300 steps) further.
The couple who wins the Aldi Wedding will be getting more than just an in-store ceremony.
The winning couple will get to have their Aldi wedding, with up to 50 friends and family members attending, in the Aldi Insights Center—the model store at the U.S. Aldi Headquarters in Batavia, Illinois. And after the ceremony, the newlyweds will also get an Aldi reception which will be “flowing with Aldi food and beverages.” This will include a tiered wedding cake made with Baker’s Corner (one of Aldi’s in-house brands) ingredients, along with small bites like Aldi’s chicken sliders. Aldi will even give all of the guests custom wedding favors. And that’s still not all! The couple will also get free Aldi groceries for a year (in the form of $5,000 in Aldi gift cards) to ensure that the relationship will last (the relationship between the new couple and Aldi, that is).
So. How can you win this wedding? Simple: Be the most Aldi-obsessed couple the world has ever seen. Then, once you’ve accomplished that, go to the Happily Ever Aldi website between August 3 and August 17 and tell Aldi “what makes [your] love story special and why [you] deserve to be the first couple ever to be married at Aldi.” That’s right, the first couple ever! What a flex that would be.
I can already imagine it: Some poser comes up to me at a party telling me about some real accomplishment in their life and I get to grab my significant other’s arm and say, “Oh wow, you know it’s cool that you cured the common cold or whatever, but we were the first couple ever to get married in an Aldi!” And then I would proceed to show off my ring (a very classy Aldi-brand ring pop, of course). But unfortunately that’s all just wild speculation at the moment, because first I need to find a significant other, and then I need to convince Aldi that my boo of ten days and I are going to name our unborn child Aldi Batavia-Illinois Block-Pardee. (It doesn’t matter what that S/O’s actual last name is, the hypothetical child’s last name will be hyphenated Block-Pardee simply because that’s hilarious.)