Our Honest Review of the New Monster Rehab Green Tea

Back in my day, Monster Energy drinks were what you would drink when you didn’t want any of those old, fuddy-duddy sources of caffeine. They were the energy drinks for people who were too cool for cold brew or iced tea. But now, here we are. Monster has an entire line of coffee-flavored energy drinks with their Coffee + Energy selection, and now there’s Rehab Monster Green Tea. 

Okay, so this Green Tea Rehab Monster isn’t strictly new. It’s returning to shelves after it was discontinued (perhaps because of a 2012 lawsuit, we’re not sure). Is it better than ever? Or were the “potentially dangerous” levels of epigallocatechin-3-gallate in the original Green Tea Rehab Monster the key to its success? We cracked a can to find out.

Rehab Monster Green Tea

New Monster Rehab!

Rehab Monster Green Tea

Even though I think this goes against the whole purpose of Monster (Monster flavors should be extreme and green tea is not extreme), I was excited to try a Monster green tea. I like green tea. I was also interested in trying a non-carbonated Monster. And there was also all that hype—people were real angry when the original Rehab Monster Green Tea was discontinued. Some folks even started petitions to bring it back. So it must be pretty good, right? Picture the shrug emoji. That’s this Monster. 

Pros: This Monster green tea includes electrolytes, B vitamins, coconut water, milk thistle (supposedly good for liver health), and quercetin (antioxidants). So you’re definitely getting more  from a Monster Rehab Green Tea than you would from an Arizona Iced Tea. There’s 160mg of caffeine per can, which is not a huge amount. Just enough to pep you up without making your hands shake. There’s also only 15 calories per can and just 3g of sugar. What about the flavor, though? Well, here’s a positive spin: If you wish that green tea actually tasted more like Diet Nestea, then, hey, here’s the green tea drink for you. 

Cons: It’s far, far, far too sweet for me, due to the artificial sweeteners. (There may only be 3g of sugar but I guarantee you there’s plenty of sucralose.) And it just doesn’t taste like green tea. It’s made with both green and black tea, and, what little flavor of actual tea there is, tastes like black tea. Mostly, though, it just tastes like Splenda dissolved into water.

If you have fond memories of Rehab Monster Green Tea, then you should definitely try this re-release and report back in the comments to let me know if this is just like the original or a sad facsimile. Otherwise, give it a miss.




About the Author

Justine Sterling

Justine Sterling is the editor-in-chief of Sporked. She has been writing about food and beverages for well over a decade and is an avid at-home cook and snacker. Don’t worry, she’s not a food snob. Sure, she loves a fresh-shucked oyster. But she also will leap at whatever new product Reese’s releases and loves a Tostitos Hint of Lime, even if there is no actual lime in the ingredients.