Wanna Try a Brand New Hidden Valley Ranch Snack? Join the Club

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Even when you’re a Professional Food Taste Tester™ who constantly tries new products, you occasionally taste something that really stays with you. Usually, that’s because the product is either really good or really weird—and every once in a while, it’s because a product is both very good and very weird. I’m specifically thinking about Butter Chardonnay-flavored Club Minis. They were like the Club crackers you know and love—buttery, light, crispy-crunchy—but small and flavored to taste like wine. It was a completely nuts idea, but they pulled it off, and now I trust Club to do a good job with pretty much every brand collab. And that’s where the good news comes in: Mini Club Crackers that are Hidden Valley Ranch flavored, along with another new Club flavor we kind of can’t wait to try, are coming soon. 

Tell me more about these ranch Minis, would ya? 

Sure, my pleash. Club Minis have all the appeal of regular-sized Club crackers, but you can eat them in a single bite. In that sense they’re more like Cheez-Its, which you eat on their own, then they are like regular Club crackers, which you’re usually eating topped with cheese or slathered with peanut butter or crushed-up in soup or chili. They’re snack crackers unto themselves, and these are promising “big ranch flavor,” which we like. 

What are the other new Club crackers? 

If you like Club crackers because they’re so dang buttery, make room in the ol’ pantry for Club Extra Buttery crackers, which a press release says balance “savory and subtly sweet notes in a way that feels familiar, but a little more indulgent.” People clearly love a buttery cracker, but sometimes butter-flavored snacks can be…a bit much. That phony buttery flavor doesn’t always hit for us, but given that Club figured out how to make wine-flavored crackers that actually taste good, we’re inclined to give them the benefit of the doubt on this one. 

When can I get my snacky little mitts on these new Club crackers? 

Soon…if not sooner! According to parent company Mars, they’ll start popping up on grocery shelves nationwide this month with a broader rollout in March. And don’t fret if you don’t get around to grabbing a box immediately: Both of the new Club crackers are permanent additions to the brand’s lineup, unlike our beloved Chardonnay crackers. 

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About the Author

Gwynedd Stuart

Howdy! I’m Gwynedd, Sporked’s managing editor. I live in Los Angeles and have access to the best tacos the U.S. has to offer—but I’m a sucker for a crunchy Old El Paso taco night every now and then. I’ve been at Sporked since 2022 and I’m still searching frozen mozzarella sticks that can hold a candle to restaurant sticks. Why you should trust me: I’ve been a journalist for 20 years (yikes), a consumer of food for 40-plus years, and I’m truly hard pressed to think of foods I don’t like (or that I can’t tolerate at the very least). Oh and one time I cooked my way through Guy Fieri’s cookbook and wrote about the journey through Flavortown. What I buy every week: Trader Joe’s Original Savory Thins. Fat free plain yogurt (usually Fage or Nancy’s). Honeycrisp apples. Sweet cream coffee creamer for my at-home Americanos. A frozen cauliflower crust pizza and some jarred mushrooms to top it with. Old El Paso Stand ‘N Stuff taco shells and Gardein Ground Be’f, even though I think “be’f” is a nightmarish contraction. Favorite ranking: Stouffer’s frozen dinners. I don’t own a microwave (I get my cancers the old fashioned way!), so I love taste testing things that I don’t really buy to eat at home. Least favorite ranking: Soy sauce. Don’t get me wrong, I love soy sauce—but consuming that much sodium in one sitting is probably illegal in some countries. Our frozen enchilada taste test was a close second; the smell of microwaved corn tortillas still haunts me.

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