The Whole Foods Hack for Cheaper Cheese

The idea of a “stump” of food or “a wedge of a wedge” isn’t exactly appealing the first time you hear about it. But then anyone who’s eaten so-called burnt ends from a decent barbecue joint knows the true bliss of the odd bits. Really, as long as the core product is well (and lovingly, and obsessively) made, pretty much any corner, quadrant, or cut of it should echo the sublime. 

Videos by Sporked

Quite possibly nowhere is that more true than the world of cheese. Like it’s BFF bread, cheese is one of the great miracle foods―produced through a naturally occurring (and yet mysterious and ancient) process, cheese is the true byproduct of artisanal intuition and the repetitive transcendence of real craftsmanship. No wonder, then, well-made cheese, tends to be expensive. Lucky for the lactose-obsessed among us, the Whole Foods Cheese Department has a simple hack to help you save (which is good, since you’ll need the extra cash for crackers).

Yep, It’s Time To Paw Through The Cheap Cheese Bin

We’re not entirely sure it’s called that, officially. After all, Whole Foods seems to be the type of place that really wants you to believe mangoes occur naturally in perfect, Incan-style pyramidal piles. But most, if not all, Whole Foods Cheese Counters tend to have an area for wedges, stumps, and other sundry bits of really good cheese that for whatever reason could not be sold as part of a larger wedge.

If you’ve never explored your Whole Foods cheese department, well, first of all―do so. And not just because the cheese department people are usually both figuratively and literally chill. If you’re seriously interested (even if you can’t afford to buy), hang out long enough and you’ll end up getting a sample or two. You’ll also probably end up finding either a basket or just a neat, motley pile of wrapped, weighed and ready-to-sell cheese lumps and stumps and sticks, often indicated with a sign encouraging you to “Try a Bit.” 

A Serious Selection

Granted, you won’t find every kind of cheese represented. What ends up wrapped up in smaller quantities is the result of “cheese happenstance,” which is 100% a term we just invented. But chances are high you’ll find a good variety of cheeses, including some of your own favorites―anything from ready-to-ooze ultra-thin wedges of double creme brie to aforementioned plucky, funky, sweetly creamy White Stilton. 

Come to think of it, Whole Foods might have the best cheese department of any nationwide grocery chain we can think of. Their regular selection includes anything from ultra-aged Manchegos and Goudas and Parmiggiano Reggianos (which go all sorts of four-dimensional nutty and sweet, with those delicate, umami-rich crystals) to truffle-studded, well, everything, to expensive, creamy classics like Humboldt Fog (and beyond). And then there are seasonal offerings. And when you buy them this way, you only pay $3 to $5 (versus something more in line with the $20 per pound). Bonus points: hang out long enough and you’ll make friends with the cheesemonger, who will (very likely) enthusiastically introduce you to yet more delicious, miraculous cheese.