What Is Smart Water, Really?

Water used to just be this thing that covered 71% of the Earth’s surface. It came out of taps and you could drink it to get hydrated. Then, bottled water came along, and now you have dozens of choices of portable, potable drinking options at your local grocery store. One of the most popular is Smart Water, but how much do you really know about this supposedly intelligent beverage? Let’s educate ourselves on Smart Water!

Who owns Smart Water?

Glaceau Smart Water is owned by Energy Brands, which is a subsidiary of—you guessed it—the Coca-Cola company. Yes, as with most mass marketing beverages, you’ve got your choice of PepsiCo, Keurig Dr Pepper, and Coca-Cola, and here we have the Coke company.

Is Smart Water distilled?

Smart Water is distilled. Let’s go to the corporate website for some more detail: “It’s vapor-distilled through a process inspired by the clouds.” I’m not entirely sure what that means, but it sounds good!

What is in Smart Water?

The obvious answer, of course, is two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen, but Smart Water gets a little more complicated with the equation. According to the nutrition label, Smart Water includes vapor distilled water, calcium chloride and magnesium chloride and potassium bicarbonate (electrolyte sources). Per the label, the electrolytes (aka ionized minerals) are added for taste. 

Is Smart Water spring water?

According to Aqua Maestro, a water distributor, Smart Water is spring water, sourced from a spring in Northern Connecticut. 

What is the pH of Smart Water?

As it turns out, it is a little challenging to get a straight answer about this. The pH of your drinking water is typically around 5.2, and that’s likely right around the level that classic Smart Water is at. However, Smart Water also has a product called Alkaline Smart Water that has a very high pH balance of 9.5. Be sure you’re not grabbing the Alkaline water if you’re just looking for a normal, everyday bottle of water.

Does Smart Water make you smarter?

Unfortunately, unlike the super-drug in the Bradley Cooper movie Limitless, Smart Water will not cause you to become a genius, or give you unparalleled fighting ability. On the plus side, it will keep you hydrated, which is pretty super in its own right. 

Finally, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention that not everyone thinks Smart water is so smart. In 2018 Smart Water was given the “Golden Windbag” anti-award for “the most brazen lie in food advertising” that year. The group said that Smart Water is, “nothing but ordinary water” sold by advertising a “scientifically-sounding but completely unnecessary production process,” which yields no proven nutritional benefits, for as much as seven times the price of some other bottled waters.

Whatever your opinion on the marketing, Smart Water is everywhere you go these days, so you have probably already tried it. What do you think—is the special, cloud-inspired process worth the extra money?


About the Author

Matt Crowley

Matt Crowley is a comedy writer living in Los Angeles. He likes maple-flavored snacks, loves every kind of cheese, and is slowly learning to accept mushrooms.

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