Griffin Parker
Earlier this year, I covered the news that Dolly Parton was getting into the bachelor meal single-serving frozen entree game. Lucky for all of us, I found these in-store last week and elected to eat them in lieu of actual breakfasts so I can review the whole lineup of Dolly Parton frozen meals for you good people. Let’s find out whether Dolly truly can do anything.
- Dolly Parton’s Chicken & Dumplings
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Pros: The chicken is surprisingly flavorful (miles better than the Hot Pocket chicken I was subjected to recently) and the gravy is actually seasoned. That feels like a bare minimum factor, but I have eaten so many bland freezer meals that it’s worth mentioning.
Cons: The dumplings are a little rubbery, which feels unavoidable for a microwavable meal, so I can’t fault them too much. The carrots have that quintessential “didn’t actually soak in the gravy” problem. It feels silly to say that I don’t like how much these carrots taste like carrots, but real ones know that properly stewed carrots sacrifice their natural flavor to the glory of gravy/broth/etc.
Credit: Liv Averett / Target
- Dolly Parton’s Beef Pot Roast
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Pros: Much like the Chicken and Dumplings, I was pleasantly surprised with the flavor of the protein in this meal. This is the only frozen pot roast I’ve ever seen that includes skin-on potatoes. You’re not getting that from Dinty Moore, I can assure you.
Cons: While the carrots in this frozen meal did pick up more of the gravy than the ones in the Chicken and Dumplings, they still suffer from that same “added to the pot too late” taste and texture.
Credit: Liv Averett / Target
- Dolly Parton’s Country Fried Steak
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Pros: This steak is good! While the texture isn’t exactly what you’d expect (read on for why), the flavor is basically where it should be. The bacon-y mashed potatoes are very reminiscent of the reality of actual mashed potatoes collecting sauce and crumbs from any entree nearby.
Cons: Flipping the steak halfway through cooking as directed results in most of the breading sloughing off both sides of the meat, which means it gets stirred in with the bed of mashed potatoes it’s placed upon. Does it taste bad? No! Does the conglomeration end up a confusing mess that looks nothing like country fried steak? Unfortunately. Also, the green beans are so bad, I’m bringing this entire meal down a point. The little specks of bacon scattered around don’t help.
Credit: Liv Averett / Target
- Dolly Parton’s Shrimp & Grits
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Pros: I’m not qualified to judge shrimp and grits, but my partner—who’s spent some time in New Orleans—signed off on this as “surprisingly flavorful!” The tomatoes held their structure after over five minutes in the microwave, and there was more shrimp than either of us expected in a frozen meal. At minimum, this gets points for being the only frozen shrimp and grits I’ve ever seen in a grocery store.
Cons: The box describes the sauce as spicy when it actually tops out at just above mild. Not the end of the world, but worth mentioning.
Credit: Liv Averett / Target
Chicken & Dumplings
Rating:
8.5/10
Sporks
Beef Pot Roast
Rating:
7.5/10
Sporks
Country Fried Steak
Rating:
5/10
Sporks
Shrimp & Grits
Rating:
7/10
Sporks
Justine Sterling
Jon Gutierrez
Luke Field
