We live in an age of celebrity products. George Clooney has a tequila, Dwayne “the Rock” Johnson has a tequila, Kendall Jenner has a tequila, and Dolly Parton has cake mixes. But hey, if you’re in the mood for a celebrity product that’s more on the savory side, then, oh boy, do we have news for you. However, if you are good with the above options, then I guess we have news for Anyone But You. See what I did there? If not, you will in a second because Glen Powell (yes, that Glen Powell) just released a whole line of organic, affordable, better-for-you condiments from a brand he’s calling Smash Kitchen, and honestly? They look like a smash to us.
What does this guy have to do with condiments? Did Glen Powell get lost in the sauce (industry)? Or does he have just the right amount of sauce? Is Sydney Sweeney involved?
When Gucci Mane said, “If a man does not have sauce, then he is lost. But the same man can get lost in the sauce,” he left out a crucial scenario: What if the man is not lost in the sauce, but also doesn’t lack sauce? What if the man owns the sauce? Gucci Mane, what if that man is Glen Powell?!? But I digress. (Gucci Mane, you can email me directly and let me know your philo-sauce-ical angle here.)
Let’s talk Glen’s Smash Kitchen sauces because these actually look pretty darn fire. The Twisters actor is coming out with eight sauces: Organic Classic Tomato Ketchup, Organic Hot Honey Ketchup, Organic American Style BBQ Sauce, Organic Hot Honey BBQ Sauce, Organic Yellow Mustard, Organic Dijon Mustard, Organic Real Mayonnaise, and Organic Spicy Mayonnaise. That’s right, Smash Kitchen has everything from classic ketchup, mustard, mayo, and BBQ sauce to more unique offerings like the hot honey mashups and spicy mayo. People who have tested these out online seem to really like them, plus Glen Powell’s whole goal in this was to make these as lightly processed as possible, leaving out ingredients like high fructose corn syrup. Not only that but they are all organic, all under $5, and as the Set It Up actor put it, “You can flip the label over and actually recognize and pronounce everything on it.” And he’s not wrong, although I personally have trouble pronouncing “paprika,” but that is a me problem and in no way relates to how processed these condiments are or are not (Is it PAPrihkuh? papREEkuh? papreeKAH a la Hermione in the sorcerer’s stone? Somebody help me). And no, it would appear Sydney Sweeney is not involved in Glen’s excellent condiment venture, but who knows? Smash Kitchen is allegedly already planning some product releases beyond these condiments so it’s not too late.
Bottom line: These sauces are on sale now at Walmart stores nationwide and they cost less than $5, something Glen Powell apparently felt very strongly was an unmet need in the organic food space. Obviously, we need to try them to see if they are any good, but in terms of the concept, I think our buddy Glen smashed it.
First of all there is no reason to think Glen is my “buddy”. He’s just another “celebrity” that thinks he can endorse a product he knows nothing about.