What to Eat if You Love Seinfeld

The best part of eating at home is parking your butt in front of the TV and watching something fun while you dig in. Everyone’s done it but we at Sporked like to do things to the extreme; it’s time to pair your food with the show you’re watching! If you’re like many (and most notably Sporked managing editor Gwynedd Stuart) you fit in a rewatch of Seinfeld at least once a year. We took this as inspiration to find these best Seinfeld-adjacent foods that you can use to make your next marathon an immersive experience. Get your remote ready and keep reading to find out what to eat if you love Seinfeld.

Amy’s Quinoa, Kale & Red Lentil Soup

The Soup Nazi makes us wonder: If love is the universal secret ingredient, how can this dude’s soups taste so good?? We may never know, but we do know that you can have some very good soup without being yelled at for requesting bread. For instance, the Sporked team’s favorite vegetarian soup: Amy’s Quinoa, Kale & Red Lentil. As editor-in-chief Justine Sterling wrote, “There’s lots of turmeric flavor and tons of fun textures, so every spoonful is different.” This soup is worth lining up for. Who knows, maybe Amy found this recipe in an old armoire…

Read the full ranking of the best vegetarian soup

Drake’s Coffee Cake

Some context on this clip for the unfamiliar: Jerry finds himself in a predicament after he gets intimate with his neighbor’s girlfriend while said neighbor is in a coma. The only thing that will stop Newman from spilling the secret to Jerry’s neighbor? A Drake’s Coffee Cake, which also happens to be one of the best snack cakes we tried in our snack cake taste test. Managing editor Gwynedd Stuart described them as “fresh and squishy and extremely tasty,” not to mention great for bribing manipulative mailmen.

Read the full ranking of the best snack cakes

Golden Grahams

There are a few things Jerry really loves: Superman, Golden Boy (and Golden Boy’s son Baby Blue), and cereal. The comedian always had dozens of boxes in his cabinets and on his kitchen counter, but since he never called out a definitive favorite (correct us if we’re wrong on that!), we’re going with Golden Grahams. They’re crunchy, balanced, and a total classic, much like Seinfeld.

Read the full ranking of the best whole grain cereal

Pepperidge Farm Deli Swirl Rye & Pumpernickel

If you’re looking for Seinfeld foods to enjoy but don’t want to steal them from old ladies, we have the perfect substitute for that prized bakery marble rye. Pepperidge Farm Deli Swirl Rye & Pumpernickel has that “freshly stolen from an old lady you hounded outside of the bakery” taste without the guilt that comes with doing it yourself. It’s a soft and chewy loaf loaded with rye toastiness and sourdough tang. Leave the thievery to the Seinfeld crew and just go out and buy this instead.

Read the full ranking of the best rye bread

Trader Joe’s Chocolate Babka

As much as Jerry would like to pretend, cinnamon babka is no match for chocolate. Chocolate babka is kind of like if you made cinnamon rolls in loaf form and infused the loaf with chocolate instead of cinnamon. TJ’s version doesn’t appear in any of our rankings, but the team recently had it for Jordan’s birthday and it was so good we had to include it here (and a list of memorable Seinfeld foods kind of has to include a chocolate babka). This beauty is worth fighting for.

Trader Joe’s Organic Italian Dressing with Romano Cheese

Take credit for your own big salads by pulling out your biggest bowl and drenching your big ingredients in Trader Joe’s Organic Italian Dressing with Romano Cheese, a dressing with such a big flavor, it topped our list of the best Italian dressing. Danny had big things to say about this dressing, especially about its “great acidity, good oil-based richness, and its healthy amount of herbage.” And for dessert? A big bowl of frozen yogurt, which may or may not be fat free.

Read the full ranking of the best Italian dressing

About the Author

Vinz Karl

Vinz Karl is a freelance contributor to Sporked and self-proclaimed Guy Fieri superfan. He believes in breakfast supremacy and is on a never-ending mission to try every flavor of Oreo out there. Originally from the Midwest, Vinz now resides in Los Angeles, where you can find him going on hikes, checking out new restaurants, and preparing for his eventual casting on CBS's Survivor.

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