Rise and shine, my dudes. Set down that box of cereal—we found better breakfast options in our taste tests this year. In 2024, we ate our way through innumerable breakfast burritos, frozen pancakes, and French toast sticks, but a couple of products kept giving us something to wake up for. They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, and I’m pretty sure that means this is the most essential info you will absorb this year. Wild, right?
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I’m a freak for sausage gravy. One of the best things about growing up in the South is that sausage gravy is a true breakfast staple—you’ll even find it on the menu at fast food joints, like Hardees and Krystal. It’s pretty easy to make, but c’maaan—you’re not going to make it all the time. That’s where this brilliant frozen breakfast comes in. It’s literally just a Banquet pot pie crust (which we love) filled with sausage gravy. That’s it. It’s warm, sloppy, and satisfying. If heart disease didn’t run in my family, I would seriously eat this every day. If you and your arteries are young, hale, and hearty, give this a shot!
There are all sorts of treasures in the Ikea grocery section. Sure, you’re gonna grab some frozen meatballs and a packet of that yummy gravy, but don’t snooze on these heart-shaped waffles. These are not your average, everyday frozen waffles. They’re chewy and a bit eggy. They’re savory rather than sweet. Sure, you can still top them with lingonberry jelly or maple syrup, but you can also top them with creme fraiche and caviar and have yourself a nice little fancy-boy morning. Or use them as the “bread” in a breakfast sandwich made with soft-scrambled eggs and chives. The possibilities are endless! We love these things.
Howdy! I’m Gwynedd, Sporked’s managing editor. I live in Los Angeles and have access to the best tacos the U.S. has to offer—but I’m a sucker for a crunchy Old El Paso taco night every now and then. I’ve been at Sporked since 2022 and I’m still searching frozen mozzarella sticks that can hold a candle to restaurant sticks.
Why you should trust me: I’ve been a journalist for 20 years (yikes), a consumer of food for 40-plus years, and I’m truly hard pressed to think of foods I don’t like (or that I can’t tolerate at the very least). Oh and one time I cooked my way through Guy Fieri’s cookbook and wrote about the journey through Flavortown.
What I buy every week: Trader Joe’s Original Savory Thins. Fat free plain yogurt (usually Fage or Nancy’s). Honeycrisp apples. Sweet cream coffee creamer for my at-home Americanos. A frozen cauliflower crust pizza and some jarred mushrooms to top it with. Old El Paso Stand ‘N Stuff taco shells and Gardein Ground Be’f, even though I think “be’f” is a nightmarish contraction.
Favorite ranking: Stouffer’s frozen dinners. I don’t own a microwave (I get my cancers the old fashioned way!), so I love taste testing things that I don’t really buy to eat at home.
Least favorite ranking: Soy sauce. Don’t get me wrong, I love soy sauce—but consuming that much sodium in one sitting is probably illegal in some countries. Our frozen enchilada taste test was a close second; the smell of microwaved corn tortillas still haunts me.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!
Gwynedd Stuart
Danny Palumbo
Vinz Karl
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!