Pepperidge Farm has released a lot of fun new Goldfish flavors in the past few years—the Old Bay flavor was a personal fave—but at the same time there have been some glaring omissions in their offerings. With all due respect to Pepperidge Farm and that nice old man who used to hawk their cookies and bread, why the hell did it take until the year of our lord 2026 for Ranch Goldfish to exist? Well, the good news is that come January 2026, Ranch Goldfish will start swimming onto shelves, along with two flavors of Goldfish Pretzels, the first flavored Goldfish Pretzels ever. Since we’re professional food taste testers—aka the nepo babies of the snack world—we were able to get an early taste of all three new products and they are good.
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Pros: I always like Goldfish Pretzels more than I think I’m going to, but I swear these new ones are even better. Maybe it’s my imagination, but they look a touch bigger and a little more puffed, which means you get even more crunch as you eat. And if you’re into flavor-blasted Goldfish, you’re going to like the new line of flavored pretzels—these little suckers are absolutely covered in flavor dust.
Cons: Of the three new Goldfish flavors, this was my least favorite. There’s just not a lot of dimension to the seasoning blend—the heat is nice, but the vinegar-y tang overwhelms pretty much every other facet of the flavor profile.
Pros: I’d always been a big fan of Snyder’s Honey Mustard & Onion pretzel pieces, but I swear they’ve gotten less delicious. I retasted them when I was updating our best pretzels ranking earlier this year and they didn’t even make the cut. So, even though these Honey Mustard Goldfish Pretzels aren’t re-inventing the wheel, they’re a welcome addition to the snack aisle because they are good. Really good. They’re seriously flavorful, with a Dijon mustard-adjacent heat and a little bit of honey sweetness for balance. And there’s so much flavor dust on these, you’re never left searching for flavor. It’s in your face. In a good way.
Cons: Traditionally, honey mustard is the most palatable mustard for people who might be sensitive to the hit-you-in-the-nostrils pungency of mustard seed. This is a pretty intense mustard flavor by honey mustard standards, which certainly could be a con for some people.
Pros: Doesn’t it seem like Ranch Goldfish should have existed all along? This new Goldfish flavor is so good, I like imagining that someone has been in a darkened lab somewhere for the past 30 years perfecting the seasoning blend. It really is perfect. As advertised, it’s extremely zesty, with a nice blend of herbs and garlic and just a little bit of sweetness and tang, like a buttermilk ranch dressing would have.
Cons: When Goldfish does flavors, they use plain Goldfish crackers, which, objectively, are not the best Goldfish. These would be even better with a little bit of baked-in cheesy flavor, although I will say that my colleague Justine Sterling thought she detected a cheesy flavor baked into the cracker itself.
Howdy! I’m Gwynedd, Sporked’s managing editor. I live in Los Angeles and have access to the best tacos the U.S. has to offer—but I’m a sucker for a crunchy Old El Paso taco night every now and then. I’ve been at Sporked since 2022 and I’m still searching frozen mozzarella sticks that can hold a candle to restaurant sticks.
Why you should trust me: I’ve been a journalist for 20 years (yikes), a consumer of food for 40-plus years, and I’m truly hard pressed to think of foods I don’t like (or that I can’t tolerate at the very least). Oh and one time I cooked my way through Guy Fieri’s cookbook and wrote about the journey through Flavortown.
What I buy every week: Trader Joe’s Original Savory Thins. Fat free plain yogurt (usually Fage or Nancy’s). Honeycrisp apples. Sweet cream coffee creamer for my at-home Americanos. A frozen cauliflower crust pizza and some jarred mushrooms to top it with. Old El Paso Stand ‘N Stuff taco shells and Gardein Ground Be’f, even though I think “be’f” is a nightmarish contraction.
Favorite ranking: Stouffer’s frozen dinners. I don’t own a microwave (I get my cancers the old fashioned way!), so I love taste testing things that I don’t really buy to eat at home.
Least favorite ranking: Soy sauce. Don’t get me wrong, I love soy sauce—but consuming that much sodium in one sitting is probably illegal in some countries. Our frozen enchilada taste test was a close second; the smell of microwaved corn tortillas still haunts me.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!