During a 2019 episode of Good Mythical Morning, back when Pandemic was just a board game and masks were for Halloween, Rhett & Link set out to determine which pumpkin spice snack tastes the most like pumpkin spice, thus earning it the title of “Pumpkin Spice Brian.”
They even tried some pumpkin spice (a mix of cinnamon, cloves, ginger, allspice, and nutmeg) on its own to get a good control, and then they dove into tasting the snacks, and while I know pumpkin spice anything can get a bad rap, some of these snacks were anything but basic. Here they are, in order of least reminiscent of the iconic pumpkin spice to most.
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- Milestone Pumpkin Spice Horse Treats
That’s right, Rhett & Link tried actual treats for actual horses (so you don’t have to?). Rhett noted that these bad boys looked like “prehistoric marshmallows.” That is to say, they looked like marshmallow-sized cylinders the color of packed, dry, dirt. Link thought these looked like his childhood crush’s dog Pepper’s dumps. But all visual observations aside, did these actually taste like pumpkin spice? Not one bit. Rhett said, “There is no pumpkin spice in this that a human like me can discern,” and Link agreed.
- Blue Diamond Pumpkin Spice Almonds
Blue Diamond won the salt & vinegar Flavor Match episode, so Rhett & Link had high hopes for these nuts. Alas, they didn’t immediately smell like pumpkin spice, more like cinnamon cereal, and the flavor of the almond itself overpowered the pumpkin spice powder. Rhett said they kind of taste like plain toasted almonds, but that they do taste more like pumpkin spice if you just lick them. But also, who is only licking their almonds?
- Starbucks Pumpkin Spice Latte
Ah, the PSL, the poster child of basic people everywhere, and the delicious seasonal coffee drink many enjoy in secret so as to avoid ridicule. Rhett really liked this latte even though “flavored coffees in general” are not his thing. Link took one sip and said, “I can’t.” But does it match the flavor of the spice itself? Rhett & Link decided maybe not, because they figured they only knew it was a PSL because they were told and may not have determined that it was pumpkin spice in a blind taste test.
- Kellogg’s Pumpkin Pie Spice Frosted Mini-Wheats
Both Rhett & Link thought these Mini-Wheats tasted good, just not like Pumpkin Spice. As for what they do taste like? Unclear. Link said they’re like normal Frosted Mini-Wheats plus “orange nothingness” (in that they are orange colored not orange flavored). A fail on the PS front.
- Thomas’ Pumpkin Spice English Muffins
“It’s very subterranean and subtle,” Link noted upon taking a bite of one of these English muffins. Rhett & Link could both taste the pumpkin spice in these, but it was super faint until they tried one toasted and everything changed. Well, sort of. The flavor got slightly stronger. Rhett ended up saying that it was subtle but “the exact same flavor profile as pumpkin spice,” which is what bump(kin)ed these pumpkin-flavored English muffins up to spot number two.
- Pumpkin Spice Jell-O Pudding
At last, the number one. Rhett took one bite and said, “This has got pumpkin spice all throughout it.” Pumpkin spice flavor match aside, Link loved the texture, saying, “I like it. I love it. This is my type of consistency.” Both Rhett & Link all-around loved this one and thought it tasted EXACTLY like pumpkin spice. A win-win, truly. For my part, I’m excited to pick some of this up and try it, since I didn’t even know Jell-O made a pumpkin spice pudding, and I gotta admit, I’m a sucker for fall vibes.