Best Food for a Birthday Party

Every year, the day you were born rolls around. And every year you’re forced to come to terms with the finite nature of your existence and grapple with the fact your time on this planet is short and insignificant in the grand scheme of things. (I had a birthday this month, if you couldn’t tell.) And while, yes, birthdays are a classic time for existential crises, they are also a time for great joy, great food, and great friends. So, try not to think about all that other stuff and instead focus on these five foods that we here at Sporked think are some of the best birthday party foods out there.

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Fresh Finds Cheese Puffs

I don’t know about you, but to me, cheese puffs are synonymous with birthdays. Growing up, I pretty much only had these at my birthday parties once a year, and I looked forward to them almost as much as the presents (certainly more than the cake). As for these cheese puffs, they scream celebration. They have cheese flavor mixed into the corn, for cryin’ out loud, so they’re orange throughout instead of just on the outside like Cheetos. They taste cheesier, too. Sporked contributor Danny Palumbo put these in the top spot in his ranking of the best cheese puffs, concluding that the “salt, fat, and powerful cheesiness of the Fresh Finds Cheese Puff was too decadent to be beat.”

Related: Best Cheese Puffs: Start Cheesin’ With the 9 Best Cheese Puffs

 Häagen-Dazs Vanilla Bean Ice Cream

I mean, this one is a no-brainer. Name a birthday cake flavor that doesn’t go with vanilla ice cream.

I’ll wait.

You’re right, there isn’t a single one. And Häagen-Dazs Vanilla Bean ice cream is the best vanilla ice cream we know of. In their ranking of the best vanilla ice creams, Sporked senior writer Jordan Myrick even called it “the most delicious vanilla ice cream you can imagine.” And that’s pretty high praise coming from a professional food taster.

Related: Best Vanilla Ice Cream: Go Ahead, Be Vanilla

Cool Ranch Doritos

It’s not a list of the best food for a birthday party if it doesn’t include Doritos. If you see such a list and it excludes Doritos, discard that ish; it is of no use to you. And these aren’t just any Doritos, they are the best Doritos: Cool Ranch, baybee! You know them, you love them, and you likely agree with us that they are the best flavor of Doritos (unless you’re on team Spicy Sweet Chili, those are solid, too). But Cool Ranch Doritos really are the GOAT. As Jordan said, “Literally, zero notes.”

Related: The Best Doritos Flavors, Ranked

Straus Family Creamery Organic Dutch Chocolate Ice Cream

Sometimes you get a cake that specifically goes with chocolate ice cream. Sometimes you just want chocolate ice cream because it tastes really good, and hey, I respect that. I really do. So, for all the chocolate die-hards out there, here is the ultimate chocolate ice cream for you. The tasters called this one “creamy and light” and also thought it had a hot chocolate-y, cocoa-y, flavor to it. It even sent editor-in-chief Justine back to her childhood, just like Anton Ego at the end of Ratatouille. I you love the taste of cocoa mixed with nostalgia, I’d check this one out.

Related: Best Chocolate Ice Cream: 8 Best Chocolate Ice Creams for Cocoa Lovers

Pillsbury Creamy Supreme Chocolate Fudge Frosting

You know what’s the best birthday party food for adults who are sophisticated and have jobs and know how to do their taxes and pay bills? FROSTING, Y’ALL, and lots of it. No, I’m not kidding. This frosting is actually so good and if you are looking to make a cake for a friend’s birthday but don’t want to go to the trouble of whippin’ up a batch of chocolate buttercream, this stuff will certainly do the trick. Jordan described it as “chocolatey, sweet, and rich. The texture is silky smooth. There’s no artificial aftertaste.” It was so good that Jordan and Sporked managing editor Gwynedd Stuart were eating this out of the carton like ice cream after the taste test. Treat your adult friend to this on their birthday—they will love you for the rest of their short, insignificant life.

Related: Best Cake Frosting: The Best Frosting at the Grocery Store Might Surprise You

About the Author

Jessica Block

Jessica Block is a freelance contributor to Sporked, a comedian, a baker, a food writer, and a firm believer that Trader Joe's may just be the happiest place on earth. She loves spicy snacks, Oreos, baking bread, teeny tiny avocados, and trying new foods whenever she can. Also, if you give her a bag of Takis she will be your best friend.

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