Everyone knows the best kind of chocolate chip cookie is one that is fresh from the oven (or, if you’re Link, one that hasn’t been in the oven at all). But if your friends have once again assigned you the role of “Cookie Master: Master of Cookies” for your monthly game night, store-bought chocolate chip cookies will work in a pinch.
When Rhett & Link tried these cookies back in 2018, they were trying to see which cookies would be good enough to leave for Santa or, you know, just for good ol’ eatin’ purposes. So, without further ado, here is Rhett & Link’s ranking of the six most popular store-bought chocolate chip cookies based on a blind taste test.
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- Pepperidge Farm Montauk Soft Baked Milk Chocolate
Once Rhett actually got the Pepperidge Farm cookie in his mouth, which took him a full 30 seconds (as you can see, they couldn’t), he said that you cannot deny the fact that “they use a weird chemical, man.” Or in other words, the chemical flavor of these cookies (which Rhett & Link pointed out is present in most store-bought soft-batch cookies, perhaps to keep them soft?) overpowered everything positive happening. Even for Link, lover of soft cookies. Rhett & Link agreed that this cookie “doesn’t taste good.”
- Keebler Soft Batch Chocolate Chip Cookies
Rhett & Link agreed that this chocolate chip cookie is definitely better than the Pepperidge Farm Montauk cookie, but it still had that chemical-y flavor soft store-bought cookies often have. Rhett clarified that this cookie was “distinctly better, but still not great.”
- Kroger Chipmates Original
Link’s first thought on this one (besides the fact that it was larger than the other cookies he’d had so far) is that it was “not a good tasting cookie.” Ooof. Link also said it “tastes like generic” and it totally is generic, but, man, “tasting like generic” cannot be a good sign for a cookie. They both decided the aftertaste of it was pretty good, but that wasn’t enough to save it.
- Chips Ahoy! Original Chip Cookies
The crunchy version of Chips Ahoy!, aka the OG store-bought cookie, immediately stuck out to Link as a really tall cookie. That is until he realized he had two stacked in his mouth. Then it was back to average store-bought cookie height—and, sadly, the flavor was pretty average as well. As Rhett said, it was “a pretty solid cookie—not great, not horrible.”
- Famous Amos Bite-Sized Chocolate Chip Cookies
The best of the crunchy cookies and also the smallest in diameter, even Link, who is not a fan of crunchy cookies without milk, thought this was better than the cookie before it (which happened to be Original Chips Ahoy!). Link pointed out that the chocolate flavor in the Famous Amos “does not overwhelm,” so the higher percentage of cookie part in these actually made them taste better.
- Mrs. Fields Milk Chocolate Chip
Easily the largest, softest, and best-tasting cookie of the bunch, Rhett & Link immediately liked the Mrs. Fields cookie’s cakey texture, tasty flavor, and the fact that, unlike the others on this list, it had “crispiness and softness.” The Mrs. Fields cookie also apparently lacked that soft cookie chemical flavor that the other two soft contenders had.