There are few things more satisfying (or dangerous) than biting into a Hot Pocket. If you love these little microwaveable hand pies but don’t want to risk suffering third-degree steam burns, you can live vicariously though Rhett & Link, who tasted every Hot Pockets flavor the crew could find on an October 2022 episode of Good Mythical Morning. Spoiler alert: Hot Pockets are always at least a little bit good, no matter the flavor, but below we’ve listed the four R&L thought were the best of the best. (And, if you’re curious, here’s what the Sporked crew has to say on the matter.)
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- Big & Bold Chicken Bacon Ranch (Ranch Blasted Crust)
When Rhett & Link first tried this Hot Pocket, they thought the ranch in this one was, indeed, bolder than the ranch in the regular Chicken Bacon Ranch. The fact that they had already tried the standard Chicken Bacon Ranch Hot Pocket made this Big & Bold version a little less exciting, but it was still pretty great! This one has a ranch-blasted crust (hence the “bold” aspect), which makes it less photogenic, but the insides are the same as the regular CBR. Overall, a solid Hot Pocket experience.
- Pepperoni & Sausage Pizza (Garlic Buttery Crust)
Link, a sausage-on-pizza guy, liked the flavor of the sausage in this Hot Pocket. (Side note: I find it hilarious that a guy named Link is a self-proclaimed sausage man.) Rhett, who generally enjoys the combo of sausage and pepperoni on pizza, loved both the pepperoni and the sausage in this Hot Pocket. Link tried this one a second time and said, “That’s good stuff,” while Rhett called it “really, really good.” His only complaint was that it kind of pushes into pizza roll territory, making it less unique than some of the other Hot Pocket flavors. It tasted great, but the more unique flavors had an edge, for sure.
- Philly Steak & Cheese (Seasoned Crust)
Unlike the cheese in some of the other steak Hot Pockets, the cheese in the Philly Steak & Cheese Hot Pocket had peppers and onions that Rhett said “really balance it out.” This one just got better the more they tasted it. Rhett decided that this one was way better than the Pepperoni & Sausage Pizza Hot Pocket, “no contest.” They both thought it tasted like a real Philly cheesesteak (no one tell Philadelphia; they will sue), and Link was very impressed with this one overall.
- Chicken Bacon Ranch (Crispy Buttery Crust)
Rhett’s first reaction was: “I like that. I really like that.” Specifically, this Hot Pocket’s nice balance of flavors, the tanginess of the ranch, as well as the crispy, buttery crust. They both loved the filling and also liked the chive-y, buttery, outside, which is what ultimately put this one ahead of Big & Bold Chicken Bacon Ranch Hot Pocket in the ranking. This one became Rhett & Link’s pick for the best Hot Pocket on the market—or “the hottest pocket,” so to speak.
Honorable Mentions: Link really liked the Italian-Style Meatballs & Mozzarella flavor so much he called it “bangin.” Rhett & Link also thought Big & Bold Buffalo Chicken was pretty good—not too spicy and decently flavorful. They also liked the Steak Nacho, as it was the most different from the other flavors, in a good way.
Thoughts? Questions? Complete disagreement? Leave a comment!