Whether you are watching a movie from your raggedy old couch or viewing a cinematic masterpiece from Nicole Kidman’s alleged home away from home, AMC theaters, you’re going to need snacks to go with the experience. And while some like their movies to be sweet, others like them salty, soft, crunchy, or buttery. Trust us, everyone has a go-to movie snack vibe, and today we are here to tell you what movie snack you are based on your zodiac sign. So strap in, put on your 3D glasses (or don’t, that would make this article really hard to read), and let’s start from the beginning.
Aries (March 21-April 19): Buttered Popcorn
Everybody loves buttered popcorn. You’d be hard-pressed to find a person who actively dislikes buttered popcorn, and the same goes for Aries. What can I say? They, much like buttered popcorn, are natural leaders and people love them for it. Plus, Aries loves to be #1, and no one can argue popcorn is not the #1 movie snack.
Read our ranking of the best microwave popcorn
Taurus (April 20-May 20): Soft Pretzel
Tauruses have a serene, warm, and comforting presence. What’s the most warm and comforting movie snack? Soft pretzels, baybee! These salty, buttery, fluffy, and slightly twisted bad boys are Taurus through and through. They are extremely calming to be around, and yet they still have that dark twisted streak that only comes out the minute you’ve gotten comfortable. Tauruses are sweet, but they will keep you on your toes for sure.
Read our ranking of the best frozen soft pretzels
Gemini (May 21-June 20): Red Licorice
There are two kinds of red licorice: Twizzlers and Red Vines. But just as Geminis are known for having two distinctly different sides to their personality, red licorice is known for creating two conflicting archetypes for what red licorice should be (I’m team Red Vines all the way). But this very conflict is part of what makes red licorice so great! Yes, it means there is a bit of chaos and at times you wonder who red licorice even is—but at the end of the day both sides are good, and red licorice without that internal battle just wouldn’t be the same. How very Gemini.
Cancer (June 21-July 22): Skittles
When you meet a Cancer, you have to crack through their emotional outer shell to get to the juicy opinions and learn what they really think. Skittles are no different. They are basically a pile of colorful pebbles, but once you crack through that outer shell, you can taste the entire frickin’ rainbow. Skittles contain multitudes and so do Cancers.
Leo (July 23-August 22): Dibs
I know I know, Dibs are far from a main-character movie snack. So why are Leos Dibs, you ask? Because you kind of have to pay attention to them the whole time. If you look away from your Dibs for like, ten minutes, they get all sad and gooey, much like Leos. That being said, Dibs are still an excellent movie snack and, like Leos, worth paying attention to. Plus, don’t worry if they melt a quarter of the way through the movie and you get all sad. In the immortal words of Nicole Kidman, “Somehow, heartbreak feels good in a place like this.” (Just bring a spoon into the theater with you; you’ll be fine).
Virgo (August 23-September 22): Snuck-In Pizza
If you are watching the movie at home, the Virgo friend ordered the pizza. If you are watching at a theater, they somehow snuck a whole pizza in in their purse. Virgos are on top of it and truly have their life together. Someday I hope to give off the same competent and confident vibe Virgos do, but until then I will continue to present myself as chaos incarnate.
Read our ranking of the best frozen pizza
Libra (September 23-October 22): Chocolate Covered Pretzels
Libras love balance and fairness, and since there is no snack more balanced flavor-wise than the sweet-and-salty delight that is chocolate-covered pretzels, it is only fair that we all bring them into our next movie-watching experience. Thank you, Libras, for the inspo!
Read our ranking of the best chocolate covered pretzels
Scorpio (October 23-November 21): Junior Mints
Why are Junior Mints Scorpios? Because Scorpios are hard to read and mysterious and it is mysterious to me that Junior Mints aren’t more popular. People really are sleeping on these little suckers. They are essentially mini York Peppermint Patties and they are fanTASTic. In conclusion: eat more Junior Mints and be friends with more Scorpios. Second conclusion: York Peppermint Patties should be called Senior Mints.
Sagittarius (November 22-December 21): Mystery Flavored Airheads
Sagittariuses are curious folks, and there is nothing curious and inquisitive people love more than a good mystery. You could make your Sagittarius friend’s day by inviting them over to eat mystery-flavored snacks, think about how wifi works, and watch the entirety of Scooby-Doo. They will love it, I promise.
Capricorn (December 22-January 19): Dots
Capricorns have more patience than any other sign. You know what else takes patience? Chewing Dots. But it is worth it, because then you get more flavor spread out over a long period of time, plus the candy lasts longer than if it were a quick chew like M&M’s. The patience pays off, just like it usually does with Capricorns in any of their pursuits.
Aquarius (January 20-February 18): Popcorn Candy ‘Splosion™
M&M’s, buttered popcorn, Skittles, a whole king-sized Snickers bar, a single penny—you name it, it could go in Popcorn Candy ‘Splosion™. Leave it to an Aquarius to take the road less traveled and throw all of their favorite movie snacks into one giant melty, messy bowl. This is utter chaos and you will need several napkins, but I happen to think Aquarians are onto something here. Why experience one thing when you could experience everything everywhere all at once while watching Everything Everywhere All at Once?
Read our ranking of the best M&M’s flavors
Pisces (February 19-March 20): Milk Duds
Milk Duds are a classic movie snack (so are Raisinets, but I wasn’t about to do anyone dirty like that), and Pisces are all about those classic, nostalgic things we remember from childhood. They love to romanticize life because pretending you live in a movie is just more fun than not doing life that way. So why not grab your Pisces friends, pretend you are all in a movie, grab some chewy Milk Duds, and have a retro day at the theater while “ceilings” by Lizzy McAlpine plays in the background? The aesthetic alone will make your Pisces friends’ day.