I can’t resist condiments. If I’m at a BBQ and I am presented with a table of ketchup, mustards, relish, etc., I will put each and every one onto my burger. Heck, I’ll throw some blue cheese salad dressing on there if a bottle’s sitting out. The result? A sopping wet burger that tastes like sauce and nothing else. But I just can’t help myself.
That’s why I am advocating for offering just one single sauce at a cookout: thousand island dressing.
It’s the perfect sauce for anything you are cooking on the grill. Just think about it: No other sauce can pair with burgers, hot dogs, chicken, shrimp, and vegetables. Ketchup? Your grilled veggie kebabs won’t like that. Spicy brown mustard? Your shrimp will be overwhelmed. Plain mayo? Are you kidding me?
If you’re wondering to yourself, “What is thousand island dressing?,” well, we have a whole article on that. But tl;dr, it’s basically mayo, ketchup, vinegar, and spices, though recipes differ brand to brand. It’s like a cookout condiment mashup (remember mashups? Hi, Girl Talk!). And you can try to deny it, but no one can resist a good mashup. (Just try to keep your head from bobbing when Avril Lavine’s “Girlfriend” blends with Rich Boy’s “Throw Some D’s” in “Shut the Club Down.”)
You might get some push back when someone notices a lack of ketchup, but just look them in the eye and say, “You have everything you need in this bottle.”
We at Sporked favor Ken’s Steak House Thousand Island. It took the top spot in our best thousand island dressing ranking. We think it works particularly well as a burger sauce, but it’s also thin enough to be an actual salad dressing. Can you say that about yellow mustard?
Do yourself a favor and Marie Kondo your condiment table. Plonk down a single bottle of thousand island and enjoy your cookout. Not only will it make your life easier, it will also save me from myself.