When you are a twentysomething and your parents visit you, it is always a scramble. You want them to think you are a super put-together adult, but also there’s nothing in your pantry besides instant ramen and chocolate chips, and you have never once washed the floor of your shower because “it’s a shower so it essentially cleans itself, right?” If that entire yikes of a sentence feels at all relatable to you, don’t worry dawg, I gotchu. Here is Sporked’s list of what to buy at the grocery store if your parents are visiting (and please clean your shower, my guy).
- Trader Joe’s Unexpected Cheddar
Pick up a block of this Unexpected Cheddar from Trader Joe’s and, true to its name, your parents will never see it coming. You can offer them a full-on charcuterie board so good that they will almost forget they are sitting on a folding chair and a YETI cooler in a 23-year-old’s crappy apartment. Seriously though, this cheese is on par with some of the high-end name-brand cheddars in both look and taste, so your parents will think you splurged to get them something truly nice. And someday when you have disposable income you will actually splurge but for now you can give them some crackers and fig jam along with what managing editor Gwynedd Stuart called “crumbly, delicious white cheddar” that was an “awfully nice surprise.”
- Grapefruit Bubly
What’s more fancy than inviting someone into your home and asking them what they would like to drink? Nothing. Nothing is more fancy. Even if you just have one flavor of sparkling water on hand, you will feel like king of the beverage options, handing out beautiful cold beverages to your loyal subjects (aka your parents, the people that made you). And if you are looking for a crowd-pleasing seltzer flavor, this Grapefruit Bubly ought to do the trick. This flavor was so good editor-in-chief Justine Sterling wanted to “wash [her] hair in the stuff.”
Related: Best Bubly Flavors, Ranked
- Green Giant Riced Veggies Cauliflower
When your mom inevitably and inexplicably goes snooping through your fridge and freezer on a search for roughage, you can impress her by stocking them with versatile (affordable) veggies. One such veggie is this humble cauliflower rice, which Gwynedd called “crunchy and pleasant, fluffy but firm.” It can accompany any dish and is ready in minutes, plus your mom will be proud of you for having bought a vegetable, you responsible adult, you.
- Lemony Arugula Basil Salad Kit
This salad slaps. It is hands down the best store-bought salad kit I have ever had. If your parents are not only visiting but expecting you to make the salad to go along with the dinner they either bought or ordered, this salad is your guy. Justine described the dressing as “very bright and zingy,” and talked about how the “almonds are small so they cling to the lettuce, creating a lovely crunch.” She also loved how the carrots in the salad are shaved so that every ingredient has about the same thickness, making them easier to eat and better at being coated by the delicious dressing. Go. Buy. This. Salad.
- Special K
They will check your cereal cabinet. They simply will. And if you have no cereals in there, they will suggest you stock some steel-cut oats or All-Bran. And if you have something like Cocoa Puffs in there, they will suggest you go buy some Wheat Chex or something and then promptly start snacking on your Cocoa Puffs. But if you put some Special K in there? Man, will they be proud of you for making such an adult breakfast choice. Plus, even though the cereal on its own is a “winning combo of rice, wheat, and barley that tastes great and stands up nicely to milk,” you can throw in berries and granola and make a whole fancy thing of it. And isn’t “making a whole fancy thing of it” what being an adult is all about?
- Whole Foods 365 Roasted Garlic Hummus
Hummus is Helths. That’s what I always say. The protein, flavor, and chickpea-packed dip will show your parents that you aren’t just eating veggies and nothing else, you are mixing it up with some pita chips, too—and they will see you have great balance in your life as well as enough protein sources to keep you full throughout the day. Not only that, but this hummus is delicious so when they randomly open it up to see if you made a good purchase they will be met with abundant roasted garlic flavor as well as “a nice balance of sesame flavor and lemon to boot.”
No go make your parents proud and buy some adulty (yet still delicious) foods!
*Also clean your shower. Really. This is not a drill.